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Healing together

Continued from a previous post.
At the Burn Center

Today was a phenomenal day for Max! We saw a true change in his spirit, motivation, and overall attitude toward his situation. Knowing that both Laurie and I are around, family and friends have been and will continue to visit, reading him everyone’s positive comments, and being in such a great facility with an incredible staff have all contributed to Max’s healing.

Max didn’t have the best night’s sleep though. His hands would try their best to reach for his face and scratch, but I wouldn’t let them. He was awoken by the failed attempts to draw blood from his bruised right arm. And he had to make a couple of bathroom trips with the pole on wheels in tote. But that was the extent of annoyances for the remainder of the day which was yet to unfold.

I woke up and Laurie was already up and by his side, her smile gleaming at me from across the room. It’s been quite the time with her Max and I in this 200 sq.ft room – we have our own bathroom and a window to the parking lot. Even though we’ve been in such close quarters, we’ve spent hardly any time together, maybe the occasional hug and goodnight kiss – but that’s about it. We are both intently focused on Max.

Max was awake and ready to go – he had already eaten part of his cheese omelet and slice of ham, so I was getting a late start at 7:30 in the morning, but I was ready for another Lego run. I helped him finish off his meal and Laurie cruised out to get some coffee. We reviewed the type of Legos I was going to get – Lego Agents, and if I wanted I could also get a Nerf gun – if I wanted.

After finishing my coffee, I headed out to Fred Meyer once again. It was nice to get out. Laurie and Max went for a walk and found the ‘underground tunnel’ – an adventure for sure. When I returned they were back in the room and Back to the Future 2 was on (not one of Spielberg’s best). Laurie told me Max could see me through the window walking back from the Pathfinder with a couple of boxes – he was excited. I also had a tub of large curd cottage cheese for Eric, who is doing better and is being sent home tomorrow. Eric has some serious burns as well, but the doctor believes he is fine to go home and return in a week or so for a check-up. Max will be here until Saturday, at which point the doctor will give us a clearer picture on next steps. Max was thrilled upon my arrival and wanted to start building – but then a couple of staff walked through our door – the people from ‘school’ had arrived.

Max was thrilled, he was actually looking forward to going to school/therapy (like he mentioned the day before). They gave him a fresh pair of booties and we were off. We walked outside and across the street to the main hospital. Then once inside we went up the stairs to the children’s hospital. It was nice – cool art, and fun colors – things you’d expect to see in a pediatric center (and actually should be all over the hospital). We walked past the older section and into the physical therapy area – this part was fun! Max was handed a basketball and immediately started shooting hoops – not in a gym, but in the hallway and shooting baskets into one of those portable outdoor 4ft tall kids backboards with a plastic hoop and net. It was great, he was smiling and having a good time using both his arms and catching the full size basket ball no-problem. Then they had him shoot hoops while sitting on one of those big bouncing balls – he was working the core! Next it was battle ball! Picture a really short kayak paddle, but with flat paddles. We were each handed one of these and a balloon. The game was simple, hit the balloon to your opponent, so back and forth the balloon went. Then they asked if he liked scooters – Max was all over it. With helmet on, Max went scooting! Through hallways and down to the kids area, where there was a theater, bingo hall, video game area and lounge – he was stoked! They showed him the classroom – which was on the way back. And then they showed us how to get back through the tunnel.

It was so funny – the PT was fast walking after Max with her arms spread out behind him in the tunnel – like a kid would do if they were trying to make believe they were flying – but she was doing it to protect him in the event he slipped and fell or something – Following him like a nervous parent does her child as she learns to ride a bike. But Max being the expert scooter that he is kept one eye ahead and the other on her, going fast enough juuust to keep her on her toes. Super fun and super funny to watch!

Once we got back to our room, Max was exhausted and happy – he told Laurie about bingo at 1:30 and school right after that – he was pumped. We chilled out in the room, had some lunch and started building Legos – then it was time to pick up aunite! I gave Max a kiss and headed to the airport.

When we returned, Max was gone – off to bingo I suppose, and then off to school. So we left the room and headed up to the children’s hospital. As we approached the double doors I noticed Laurie and Max walking towards us and it looked like Max had something in his hands. As they got closer we noticed it was a four pack of Play Doh! ‘Max! What’s that?’ I asked ‘I won this at bingo! Hi aunt Yvette!’ he said. He won a prize and had a smile on his face and was heading to school.

The school was cool. It was a room with a bunch of school stuff in it – books, computers, maps, word search, desks, more books. Laurie and Yvette took off and Max and I hung out for a little bit, learning about our country – but I could tell he needed some space just like we did, so I left him in the good hands of the teacher.

Later, back at the room, our friends Harold and Dave paid us a surprise visit! Max was at school and it was almost time for him to come back anyways, so I decided to take them over to pick him up. Once we got to the school room, it was Max and the teacher sitting next to each other and Max playing Math Blast on the computer – he was smiling again, and happy to see more visitors – Or maybe it was seeing that gift Harold was toting in a bag, either way he was smiling. And his smile got even bigger as we cruised back to the room in a wheelchair – at times pulling wheelies.

The day wound down with some take out from Pastini’s, the completion of a Lego set and another visit from cousin Nicole. We threw in Rush Hour 2 and vegged it out.

Max had a great day full of activity. The swelling on his face has pretty much subsided and his appetite is strong. He’s only got one tube going in his nose for nutrition and that’s it. He’s crashed out right now sleeping super heavy (no meds now) and preparing for what will no doubt be another great day tomorrow.

Today was great – and if it weren’t for being in the hospital and being wrapped up, I swear you wouldn’t know that this kid was injured at all.

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Tragedy, family, friends and neighbors

It wasn’t but 8 days ago when I posted a photo of Max playing soccer on a warm summer day in Bend. Today I find myself looking after him with Laurie at the Oregon Burn Center in Portland. The amount of support we have received has been overwhelming and Laurie and I thank everyone so much for their thoughts and prayers. Everything has been happening so fast – it’s been hard for us to keep up with letting everybody know how Max is doing so I think it’s best to just post his status here as he is being treated.

On my way out the door to Portland on Friday I made my best attempt to let family and friends know what had happened, but in my haste (and using Laurie’s computer) I didn’t get an email out to everybody so I will recap what happened and end with where we are today.

Friday evening Max was standing outside by the bbq grill when our friend Eric was making an attempt to re-light the fire w/ some sort of fuel. Max tells me now that he was standing about six feet away from the grill when the fuel my friend was using exploded. I was sitting inside talking to Laurie  when all of a sudden we saw this massive explosion right outside the side patio – I had never seen such a thing before in person. The 1st thing I thought of was Max. I immediately ran outside and saw both Max and friend partially on fire – I ran towards Max and tackled him to the ground rolling him and smothering him as best I could. With the the fire off his body I ran with him to the car to take him to the hospital – but then someone called the ambulance so we waited. We grabbed as many towels as we could and soaked them in cold water to put on Max and my friend – skin was just peeling off of his face, arms and chest – Max still didn’t realize what just happened – and didn’t know at 1st why his sister and mother were screaming and why I was acting so crazy. The ambulance came, Laurie left with Max and I took Ana to her Grandparents house as fast as I could.

After dropping of Ana and explaining to mom and dad what had just happened I took off to the hospital – and waited for the ambulance to arrive.

Max started to realize what had happened and was looking at us staring at his face and was getting a little concerned – he had very serious burns on his left arm, face and chest – so the doctors decided he needed to be flown to The Burn Center immediately – my friend was to go as well, but he took the helicopter not the jet.

Once the decision was made that Max was going to Portland, I left for home to get whatever I thought I would need for our stay.

I got home – threw some clothes, toothbrushes in a bag, stopped, typed up a quick email and sent it off to whoever I could think of at the time – I let the dogs out got in the Pathfinder and raced to my dads house picked him up plugged the hospital in the GPS, got fuel made hotel reservations and headed for Portland.

The drive up there was torture – my father did his best by talking about anything but what had just happened to Max – I as a father I kept thinking how could I let something like this happen to my son. What could I have done to prevent this – why did this happen?… I had no idea how bad the burns were, if Max was going to be OK – his beautiful 10 yer old skin had been chard from his body, his eyebrows were gone, eyelashes burnt, I kept on seeing him as I did when I ran out there after the explosion – blank stare on his face while his hair was on fire, then his skin peeling off as I was trying to keep the wet towel on him – then my phone rang as we were entering Sandy – it was Laurie.

‘Hey honey, the Dr looked at Max and he thinks he’s going to be ok. his arm is kind of bad, but his face may be ok – he can see, and still feel – but we’re going to be here for about 2 weeks’ My state of mind went from uncertainty to relief – my stomach stopped churning and I felt my foot get a bit lighter – my dad immediately called my mom and left a message.

Laurie was there about an hour and a half before we arrived – We 1st went to the emergency center, but they directed us across the street to the Burn Center (which is where I am now). We buzzed the door told them who we were and they let us in (it was after hours). Once inside there were a series of doors we had to go through to get to where Max was – but it was quick.

I remember walking into the room with my dad – it was very quiet, somewhat brightly lit and there were two nurses working on Max. They had already mostly finished wrapping him up. His head was mostly covered with dressing less a few holes for his nose and eyes, they had already wrapped his arm and were just finishing his chest – ‘Have you washed your hands?’ one of the nurses asked. We were directed to the hand washing station before we could approach Max.

Immediately after washing my hands I quietly walked up to Max who was sedated and appeared to be unresponsive. I whispered in his ear ‘Max it’s dad, I’m hear’ – his head jerked toward me and his right hand moved up to reach for me. I squeezed it just hard enough to let him know I was right there. He let go of my hand and then gave me the thumbs up – and then put his hands back down and was out again.

Max had tubes and wires all over him – he had a tube in his nose to feed him, a tube in his mouth to make sure he could breath,  a catheter in him so he wouldn’t have to get up to go to the bathroom, IV in his arm for hydration and potassium, a blood pressure gauge on his ankle, a blood oxygen reader on his finger. These guys had him covered. I believe the people at St Charles actually put the breather tube in him before the flight.

Our 1st night here was rather bizarre – after spending a little bit of time with Laurie and making sure Max was OK I took dad to the hotel and drove right back here. Dad was looking tired and I knew he could have used some sleep – All of us had gone from 0 to 200 in seconds and we still had no idea what the final outcome would be. They set us up with cots in the waiting room so we took turns staying with Max and the whole time I was just starring at him, thinking is this really happening?

The next day (Saturday) was amazing – Max did not look good at all – but it was amazing to get calls, emails, and text messages of support from our family, friends, and neighbors. Laurie’s brothers and childhood friend flew in from the east coast, my brother just happened to be in Portland with his wife for a Wedding so he was here too. Max’s face was swelling up by morning, healing, but it looked bad – his spirits were up and he would give us the thumbs up on occasion and would gesture with his two arms up for hugs. They had been medicating him for the pain that he was no doubt in. Throughout the morning and afternoon he would have moments of lucidity, gesturing in the air like he wanted to write something – so we gave him a pen and paper. His eyes were swollen shut, and he couldn’t talk but he still wanted to communicate with us. The 1st thing he wrote was ‘The hospital is fun’. We laughed and tried to give him the best hug we could without crushing the tubes and wires and touching his dressings – we wanted to kiss him so bad, but his lips were just raw flesh. After a moment – he realized that it was just Laurie my dad and I and he gestured for the pen again and wrote ‘I love you guys’. I started to cry. How could this little dude who was just on fire less than 24 hours ago be so strong and spirited! He was keeping our spirits up because he felt we were upset.

The day progressed with dressing changes, family visits, phone calls, emails, texts, and just starring at Max. I made my best attempt to keep people in the loop, but realized after several hours I was loosing my ability to focus on anything else but Max. I may have returned some phone calls, but it’s a blur at this point.

It’s Sunday early morning and Max is actually doing really well! The swelling on his face has gone down considerably and the doctor says his face looks like it’s going to be OK, but he’s a little concerned about his arm which is bordering a 2nd degree burn – his face was mostly 2nd degree burns, which appear to be healing – but with burns I’ve learned it can go either way.

He has just one tube in him now for food, but that’s it. He hopped out of the bed today and we took him for a roll in to the beautiful garden here. He walked around for a bit to go to the bathroom (record pee time for him today) and his appetite has come back (he was nauseous yesterday and vomited pretty much everything that was pumped into him). I’ve been helping the nurses remove and replace his dressings – Laurie helps too and has been right next to Max this whole time. There was one sad moment today when Max looked in the mirror and saw his face for the 1st time – he gasped and was shocked – he didn’t recognize himself and was scared – we assured him he was getting better and this was just part of the process. I think seeing himself really put things in perspective for Max – he’s as strong as ever and now understands what happened. He’s such a strong kid and we are so proud of him. We’ve been with him this whole time, watching movies, reading, playing roshambo, talking, explaining, and mostly relaying messages of encouragement from our family and friends. I just want to say thank you to everyone for your awesome show of support and prayers – I believe it is really helping Max’s healing process with everyone thinking positively!

The doctor came in today and gave us a bit of encouragement. We may not have to be here for 2 whole weeks – Max seems to be healing well, so that’s good to hear. Eric is also here and is doing OK – he may need some surgery to his arm/side but we will know more later this week.

It’s getting late and I’m tired, but wanted to write about Max’s condition here and continue to post his progress for family, friends and neighbors to see. Thank you all for all your positive thoughts, support, and well wishes. We really really appreciate it and realize that without you guys this would have been way way harder!